The Ad-dressing of Cats You've read of several kinds of Cat, And my opinion now is that You should need no interpreter To understand their character. You now have learned enough to see That Cats are much like you and me And other people whom we find Possessed of various types of mind. For some are same and some are mad And some are good and some are bad And some are better, some are worse- But all may be described in verse. You've seen them both at work and games, And learnt about their proper names, Their habits and their habitat: But how would you ad-dress a Cat? So first, your memory I'll jog, And say: A CAT IS NOT A DOG. And you might now and then supply Some caviare, or Strassburg Pie, Some potted grouse, or salmon paste- He's sure to have his personal taste. (I know a Cat, who makes a habit Of eating nothing else but rabbit, And when he's finished, licks his paws So's not to waste the onion sauce.) A Cat's entitled to expect These evidences of respect. And so in time you reach your aim, And finally call him by his NAME. So this is this, and that is that: And there's how you AD-DRESS A CAT.